Mascot atsopano a JungYulKim.com Awululidwa Pansipa! (pita pansi)

'Kumanzere ndi Kumanja' Comedy Dialogue

Tsikuli ndi Januware 31 m'chaka cha Zikwi ziwiri ndi makumi awiri ndi zitatu, Ofufuza awiri olimba mtima a Utumiki Waku Toilet Papering ayenera kuchita nkhondo yolimbana ndi zovuta kuti akhale opambana komanso opambana. Iyi ndi nkhani ya momwe Dotcom Kim ndi Sergeant Peartree adapulumutsira zida zonse kuchokera kugulu lowopsa la Malevolence and Compassion Skilled Trades Bureau. Zonse zidayamba pomwe kuyimba kwadzidzidzi kudabwera kuchokera ku TPSB nthawi ya 2:30 PM Eastern Standard Time:

bBBrrrrrriiiinnNNNG! _(telefoni)

BBBBrrrrrriiiiNNNGgg! _(telefoni)

BBBRrrrriiiiNNNG! _(telefoni)

^KIM ndinayankha foni mwachangu momwe ndidawonera nditaona kuti ndiiwe!

_TPSB Ndikuitana pa nkhani yachangu kwambiri. Ndikufuna kuti mupite ku ofesi ya Skilled Trades Bureau ndi kutenga zida za amalonda nthawi yomweyo.

^KIM Kodi ndingatengere chida ichi? Kodi chida chokhazikitsidwa chili pachiwopsezo?!

_TPSB D..k..ssshhhhhhh...(mzere umakhala chete)

^KIM NOoooooo Kodi zida zotetezeka?! KAPENA zida zake nzopanda chitetezo!!??

...ssssshhsss...(dial-tone)

^KIM YANKHA MEEEEeeee!!!!....

(chete)

^KIM (chete, misozi ikutsika pamasaya)

^Sarge Ndamva ZONSE MAN! Kuyimbako kunali pa speakerphone, LETS ROLL.

^KIM Zida ndi ... zida zili pangozi yotayika kapena kutayika. Ndikuganiza kuti tonse tikudziwa kuti tsopano ...

^Sarge NO KIM! Sitingalole zimenezo kuchitika!

...akuyika manja awo pamodzi pa center console, onse awiri amatembenuza switch kuti ayike ma siren...

Ndi chopondapo mpaka chitsulo, amatuluka pa stationhouse pa dirty-2 Division, ndipo nthawi yomweyo amalowetsa GRIDLOCK wathunthu.

^KIM Tsopano nthawi ili ndendende 2:42 PM ndikutumiza imelo yaifupi kwa a MURDOCK.

^Sarge Inde, koma bwanji mukundifuulira dzina lake lomaliza?

^KIM Mukutsimikiza kuti ndikufuula?

^Sarge Inde, ndikudziwa chifukwa zilembozo zili mu 'ALL CAPS'.

^KIM Wow, khalani pansi, osafunikira kundikalipira mawu oti 'all-caps'.

Anathera maola atatu otsatira akukwawa mu gridlock. Atafika ku MCSTB, maofesi anali atatseka kale. Amatseka 3:00 PM. Posafuna kugwiritsira ntchito Mphamvu zawo Zapadera Zolemba Pachimbudzi zimene ali nazo, aŵiriwo anatsimikiza mtima kubwerera tsiku lotsatira m’maŵa.

^Sarge Tili ku MCSTB tsopano.

^KIM Inde, ndizowona, ndipo zikuwoneka kuti zatsekedwa.

^Sarge sindikufuna kuti tigwiritse ntchito Mphamvu Zathu Zapadera Zapa Chimbudzi panthawiyi.

^KIM Tiyeni tibwerere kunyumba zathu kenako tibwerere ku Hot Pursuit ya nkhaniyi mawa m'mawa, chifukwa ndiyofunika kwambiri.

Apolisi awiriwa amabwerera kwawo ndikukumananso m'mawa kwambiri pa Dirty-2 Division

Apanso mu sitima yapamadzi, amayang'anizana m'maso, akugwirana manja ndi kuyimbanso ma siren, KWA NTHAWI YOTSIRIZA. Adzasunga chida chimenecho mosasamala kanthu za zotsatirapo zake.

^Sarge TIYENERA KUSUNGA CHIDA CHIMENEZO KAYA KAYA ZOTSATIRA ZAKE!

^KIM I AGGREEEEEE

Liwiro liŵirilo kudutsa mzindawo, ma siren akulira, kulira kwa hutala. Amafika ku MCSTB.

^Sarge Ndimva bwino kwambiri ndikadziwa kuti zida sizili pachiwopsezo chotayika kapena kutayika.

^KIM Osadandaula! TIDZAPEZA zida zimenezo ndipo TIDZAPULUMUTSA zida zimenezo! Ndikofunikira kuti ife, monga Akuluakulu a TPS, tiziwonetsa chifundo pazinthu zonse ndi zifukwa zonse.

^Sarge mukutanthauza chiyani kwenikweni?

^KIM Zida zimenezo, zida zosaukazo ziyenera kukhala ndi mantha, mantha pakali pano.

^Sarge Zida? Zida zilibe kumverera.

^KIM AMAtero! Ali ndi zomverera!

^Sarge (chete)

^KIM Mukuwona Sarge, ndine munthu wachipembedzo kwambiri. Lamulo la ku Canada limapereka maufulu, kotero maufulu ambiri.

^Sarge (chete)

^KIM Ku Canada tili ndi Lamulo lathu lapadera lotchedwa Charter of Rights and Freedoms. Zimapereka ufulu wachindunji kwa nzika za dziko lachilungamo koma, bwanji nyama? Nanga bwanji nyama? Kodi nyama siziyeneranso kupeza ufulu Sarge?

^Sarge Inde, ayenera ...

^KIM Nanga bwanji mitengo? Mzindawu umapanga malamulo oletsa anthu kudula mitengo. Ineyo pandekha, ndimakhulupirira maufulu amenewo.

^Sarge sure...

^KIM Sukuwona zomwe ndikunena Sarge? Nyama zili ndi ufulu, Zomera zili ndi ufulu koma, bwanji za ufulu wa zinthu zamoyo? Kodi Zinthu Zamoyo siziyenera kukhala ndi maufulu omwe china chilichonse chomwe chilipo chili nawo?

^Sarge ndikuganiza kuti ndikuwona zomwe ukunena ...

^KIM Yes! Ndendende Sarge! Zida zimenezo, kwenikweni, ziyenera kukhala ndi ufulu wofanana wa zomera, nyama, ngakhalenso anthu. Mgwirizanowu Uyenera Kuteteza Chilichonse mofanana, osati kusankha zomwe zikuyenera kukhala ndi ufulu.

^Sarge ... ndiye, zomwe mukunenazi, zilibe kanthu kuti zida zake ndi ndani...

^KIM Ndendende, zilibe kanthu, chifukwa palibe amene angakhale mwini wa zidazo. Ndi zida zomwe timasunga. Tsopano, TPSB inali kutipempha kuti 'tigwire' zidazo koma, ndingakonde kugwiritsa ntchito mawu oti 'kumasula'. Zida zowopsa zazing'onozo, zitha kutayika kapena kutayika nthawi iliyonse. Ayi, palibe chifukwa cholumikizana ndi eni ake kuti mupeze chilolezo. Ndi zida zomwe ife tikupulumutsa molimba mtima.

^Sarge ndikugwirizana ndi mawu anu.

^KIM M'tsogolomu, ndikukhulupirira kuti gulu lathu lidzalandira ufulu wa Zinthu zamoyo monga ZOFUNIKA, ndipo mwinanso zamtengo wapatali kuposa ife. Mu 'Tchata Yam'tsogolo' Ndikudziwa zomwe tikuchita lero, pa tsiku latsokali, zidzawoneka m'mbuyo ngati zolondola.

^Sarge chiyani?

^KIM Darn it Sarge!

^Sarge Murdock ali ndi ufulu pansi pa Charter of Rights and Freedoms, makamaka Gawo 8: "Aliyense ali ndi ufulu wokhala wotetezedwa posakasaka mopanda nzeru kapena kulanda."

^KIM Oh suuuuure... Koma nanga ufulu wa zida zimenezo? Zida zing'onozing'ono zomwe zimawopsyeza, zomwe sadziwa nkomwe ngati tsiku lina zidzagwiritsidwa ntchito posema ndi kupanga zenizeni za zinthu zina zakuthupi. Kodi zida zimenezo zingaganize chiyani za izo?!

^Sarge ...uuuhhhh...

^KIM NDI! Ndipo, bwanji za Ufulu Wanga wa Charter?! Kodi ndilibe ufulu ku zikhulupiriro LANGA? Ndi kukhulupirira chipembedzo chilichonse chimene ndikufuna, mosasamala kanthu kuti ndi chiyani?

^Sarge sindikudziwa zomwe mukunena koma, chonde pitilizani.

^KIM KODI NDIYENERA KUTI NDIKUTAWULIRE ENA?

^Sarge (sindikudziwa momwe mungayankhire)

^KIM NDINE WAKUPEMBEDZA!... Apo! Ndinazinena, potsiriza ndinanena. Ndine wopembedza mafano wolimba. Ndimakhulupirira umulungu wa zinthu zopanda moyo ndipo ndikuzipembedza.

^Sarge O... tsopano ndamva. Malinga ndi ndondomeko za ntchito ya Toilet Papering Service, ndikuyenera kukuthokozani komanso kukupatsani mwayi chifukwa cha chipembedzo chanu chodziwika bwino. Bravo.

^KIM Ndendende, ndipo ngati ndiyenera kupita 'Charter versus Charter' kuti ndikwaniritse udindo wanga wachipembedzo ku zida zimenezo, NDICHITE.

^Sarge Zosagwirizana ndi izi, tsamba lanu likubwera bwanji?

^KIM O, sindikudziwa, ndinayiwala mawu achinsinsi ku akaunti, kotero sindingathe kulipira dola imodzi pamwezi. Zowona sizofunika kwambiri kwa ine monga dot com domain, ngakhale ndi dzina langa, komanso zomwe ndidalembetsa ndekha, sizofunikira kwa ine. Ine ndikutanthauza ... siziri ngati ili ndi moyo kapena maufulu kapena chirichonse. Sichirinso chinthu chooneka ngati mafano amene ine ndimalambira.

^Sarge Yeah. Palibe chodetsa nkhawa.

^KIM Ndendende. Kupatula apo, ndi chitsiru chiti chomwe chingalipire ndalama zamtengo wapatali kugula dzina lachidziwitso lomwe lili ndi dzina la munthu wina mulimonse? 198 mayuro ndi ndalama zambiri pa chinthu chomwe sichakuthupi.

^Sarge Kodi mumadziwa bwanji mtengo wamtsogolo?

^KIM PALIBE NTHAWI YOCHITIKA TSOPANO, TIYENI TIYE TIPEZE Zipangizo IZI!

Amatenga zidazo ndikupusitsa mlembiyo ponena kuti akuzipereka kwa a Murdock.

^Sarge Chabwino tinapusitsa mlembi ponena kuti tikupereka zida kwa a Murdock.

^KIM Nditumiza imelo kwa Bambo MURDOCK popeza nthawi ili ndendende 9:06 AM.

^Sarge Simusowa kufuula dzina lake, ine ndaima pomwe pano.

^KIM Pepani, chala changa chidatsika pa kiyi ya caps-lock. Gee whiz, ndikukhulupirira kuti imelo yomwe ndatumizayo si umboni weniweni wosamvera lamulo lokhudzana ndi Civil Remedies Act. Ndikutanthauza kuti $2501.60 ndi yoposa $1000.

^Sarge Osadandaula, ndi anthu ochepa okha omwe amapeza ndalama zoposa $1000 ndi Attourney General. Ndikutanthauza, si 2021 panonso, thetsani ...

Ndipo ... mapeto a zochitika.

KUSAMVERA CHIFANIKIRO ndi chinthu choipa kwambiri m’maganizo mwa WOPEMBEDZA MAFANO.

Chidziwitso: Chiyambireni kulemba izi, zatsimikiziridwa kuti kugulitsa Tsambali kumatha kukhala chifukwa chophwanya mgwirizano womwe udachitika chifukwa cha 2023 Actor's Strike. Panthawiyo, ochita zisudzo ambiri adaphwanya mapangano awo ndi ma Talent Agency. Ngati Talent Agency inali ndi domain domain ndipo idalembetsa ndikuyigwiritsa ntchito m'malo mwa Actor, komanso m'dzina la Actoryo, komanso ndi chilolezo cha Actor uja ... Apa tili ndi zotsatira zake. Zikuwoneka zoyenera kwambiri, komanso zodabwitsa kwambiri kuti UNION YAKE ikuwoneka kuti yachitapo kanthu zomwe zawononga ZOKHUDZA AKE. Wow, ndendende zomwe mgwirizano wa anyamata wina udachita. Yesani kuganiza kuti ndi munthu wanji.

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